Factoid: Webster’s Dictionary of useless data

In my travels over the last 4 weeks I've had the odd occasion to visit just about every type of loo possible (toilet to those outside NZ). Not being the connoisseur of the best of places I do have one that stands above all of them........ STRATFORD, has to be the best of best. Picture this if you can; you push a button which open a sliding door, you enter and sit in the proper form, music begins to play, you finish, you get up and move to a counter where you place your hands under a soap dispenser, you then move to the right where water is applied and finally you have hot air blown over your hands until dried (music still playing). Oh I almost forgot, you push a button while still in the proper form for toilet paper.... You leave as you arrived by pushing a button....music still playing.

Final mileage for the trip as recorded by my Garmin GPS: 8496.41 km

I want to thank everyone from the New Zealand Ulysses Motorcycle Club for their support while I was here. Especially Alan Sciascia, for getting the word out that I was touring the North Island and having people open their home's to me.

The deed is done and sad to say the trip has come to an end......... if you had asked me a while back if the trip would never end, welllll I just might of had a
different story to tell with inclement weather following me throughout the trip.


Highlights

Worst: People
1. Nick ( Northland) with Australian bush hat on trying to tell a joke.....
2. Karen (Alan's wife) giving directions (bad)
3. Kay (Clevedon) cooking egg's in the morning
4. Listening to Alan crackle/laugh while watching a British comedy called, "Bottom" (just terrible)
5. And finally Nick still trying to tell the same joke with his hat off and a stuffed bird on his shoulder.

Best: People
1. Jenny Taylor (Rotorua) explaining to me how a 5 day cricket match is played ( @#$%^&* of my understanding!)
2. All of the Ulysses members, spouses, kids, dogs, cats, ex-wife's, and outright liar's.

Worst: roads
1. Castle-hill gravel; nobody uses it and its like driving over marbles


Best: roads
1. All were good but I especially liked the secondary ones that were off the beaten path. Major routes as 1,2,3,4, I tried to stay off as much as possible but were convenient when you needed to get to a place in a hurry.
2. Gravel roads that let you into the back country.

Worst: Campsites
1. Hastings Top Ten Holiday Site: no security which led to locals coming in just drinking throughout the night.

Best: Campsites
1. Rotorua Thermal Holiday Park
2. Eketahuna Cabin with heater, did I say HEATER!! $12.00 per night

Worst/Best of Meals
1. Beer with a bag of chips at night

Weather: Do I really need to go into this but here are the statistics:
Sun: 3 days
Rain, wind, overcast, low temperatures.....29 days


And the finally, the Best of Best's: Ann Grbin's
(Northland) list of 40 year virgin's in the Ulysses club!

November 1 Opotiki to Clevedon

Off to Clevedon, stopping at Kay/John Hinds place, for a night of numerous pints at the local pub, lamb or was it chicken and oyster's......

Next morning after Kay solidified my eggs that you had to beat them with a mallet to make them edible and numerous cups of coffee. It was time to head off to Alan's for the finally leg of the journey.

October 31 Wairoa to Opotiki

It was the Motu gravel road to Opotiki the next day and what a great ride it was. The weather was fine, the road a bit narrow in place's but overall it was a good ride and one I would repeat.

Into Opotiki, a stop for fish & chips, and the nearest campsite.

October 30 Napier to Wairoa

Next leg was to head to Opotiki via the Motu gravel road. I must have pissed off someone some where because just about halfway between Napier and Wairoa the chain
comes off the bike. As I brought my own tools for this trip it was a no-brainer getting the chain back on, except for having to down load all of your gear off the bike. As I had the bike up on the center stand it would be prudent to check out the chain before getting underway. You know where I am going with this story don't you?!!!!! Well as I am watching the tyre spin don't I just notice a large bubble...... It seems that the tyre has delaminated to a degree. After calling the rental company I have no other option but to continue to Wairoa and find a tyre shop. Getting into Wairoa, stopping at the Goodyear dealer, and the dealer is talking to the bike rental company as I pull in. Any how they had to bring another tyre in from Gisborne, arriving that afternoon and I had the tyre back on the bike by 1700 hrs and into a holiday camp sight for the night.

October 29 Eketahuna to Napier

Finally I made the trip to Cape Palliser and as I suspected it was raining, raining, raining and would remain as such for another couple of days. So it was to north to Napier for the night and 6 hours of riding with wet clothes.

October 27 -28 Hastings to Eketahuna

Next day it was Route 2 to Waipukurau then the Porangahau Road to Wimbledon. Got to the hotel and what do we find but the road from Wimbledon to Weber was closed
to a five day car rally. Welllllll, I never! So it was a cup of coffee and sandwich and listening to a couple of the local lads so full of smoke and mirrors.... I even moved a couple of times and they would just follow and tell me about their biking days. Finally one of the race officials told me of a gravel road that would get me to Weber (20km) Birch road). Now normally going on a gravel road would be a walk in the park. Unfortunately I just so happen to pass a turkey along the fence line, do I really need to go on with this, anyhow I hear this noise behind me and if it isn't the turkey with an attitude chasing me down the road. I stopped and he was just having an attitude check with me and the bike....... reminded me of wife number 5..!

Got into Eketahuna and they had a cabin with heater for $12.00 a day......... it was like the parting the of seas, A HEATER...!!!!! for $12.00. Somebody up there was finally smiling down on me. Weather forecast for Cape Palliser was not good and it was going to get worse so it was another day stay with the heater on...

October 26 Rotorua to Hastings

Next day it was off to Route 1 to Waiouru looking for the Taihape Napier Road. Before I get too far, I spotted another electronic Loo on the east side of Lake Taupo. There were about fifty people in a large circle around the loo and every time the lights would flash, they would all hold their hands in the air and hum ......

Getting back to the Napier road; it was probably one of the most scenic rides that I've done since being here. I could go back and forth on that road a dozen times and never get bored with it. I had estimate about 30km of gravel. Talking to one of the sheep farmer's, he mentioned that the week before the weather was right nasty and the roads were closed.

Spent the night in Hastings at a holiday camp where at 2400 hrs had a
bunch of locals come into the camp and just made all kinds of noise and of course management was not to be found.